Bee YOU tiful

I recently had the wonderful opportunity to collaborate with Shane over at Whispering Sweet Nothings and was able to guest blog. Shane's blog is amazing, full of tips, recipes, everyday posts and more. We share the same passion for body image and creating confidence in young girls, so I was beyond excited to guest post on her amazing blog.

I wanted to share that post with my readers as well, as this digs a bit deeper into why I am so passionate about the topic, and to be honest it was a little tough for me to open up to the blogosphere about my past.  However, I feel it adds that much more to my blog and my mission- and I hope you enjoy!

Whispering Sweet Nothings

 I'm a 26-year-old, working full-time while working towards completing my Master's in communication. I have a strong passion for creating confidence in young girls and recently I started a blog that works towards that mission as part of a project for one of my classes.

When I first learned of this project I couldn't think of anything else besides what I feel lacks in our young women today: Confidence.

In the year 2014 when everything is digitized, how do we see ourselves? How do we see each other? How do we compare? How do our young girls and women create self value when they are constantly looking to what isn't real- social media?

With my past in modeling and having body dismorphic disorder, I feel I am a great resource to help young women today learn what is truly important. I hope you read my blog, and provide any feedback or additional topics I should address in the future.

When I hit the age of 25, I had to take a long hard look inside of myself.. It sounds simple enough to find out who you really are and what you want, but it’s something that has plagued me for quite sometime. I’m currently writing a blog titled Creating Confidence in Young Women, and it’s really focused how the media and social media especially can impact a young woman’s perception of herself.

If you knew me in my college life, you might think I was hypocrite writing on this subject. The fact that I think Victoria’s Secret’s advertising efforts are so damaging that I refuse to pay any attention to them, and even stopped wearing their brand may sound crazy to someone when they learned I dabbled in the swimsuit modeling and promotional modeling world for several years. It’s the complete opposite in the message that I’m trying to instill in young women today. And I’m okay with that.

As a teenager and in college, I wanted to feel pretty. I wanted to be wanted and I wanted people to think I was the media’s idea of “beautiful.” I soon become involved in the “oh-so-popular” swimsuit model industry (if you will call it that). Basically, I just had my pictures taken and thought I would create attention for myself. I even thought I’d have a chance of being published in a big magazine.

The further I went along in my modeling career, I did have some pretty awesome perks. I was published in calendars and magazines, and I went on many trips to Las Vegas, Mexico, Reno, NV and Key West, FL- all places I would have never been able to travel to before. It was quite an experience.

What I didn’t like was how it made me feel. I felt nothing more than just a girl who did everything she could to fix her physical appearance, from dieting hardcore to having my nails painted perfectly and hair bleached blonde. I wore outfits that flattered my slim figure, and of course, I posted all of my modeling pictures online. And it was for attention. I wanted to hear the comments- I wanted to be told I was pretty.

When I was in swimsuit competitions and in a room full or gorgeous women from all around the world, I would constantly compare myself. “Oh, this girl is shorter, she has such a tiny waist, her hair is so beautiful.” It didn’t stop. I left everytime wondering what I could do to myself to make myself look better.

That is pathetic. I have since made a complete 180 with my life. Looks aren’t the center of everything. You couldn’t pay me enough to pose in a swimsuit now. And that’s ok. I feel I can speak on these topics of creating confidence in young women because I have been there. I have been on the side where I was envied for being a “model” (if you will) but that did not mean I was happy. In reality, I was just an insecure girl who tried to make myself fit the mold of what society thinks is beautiful. I feel that since I know both sides, I can really help young women going through body image issues. I’ve been there. I am STILL THERE.

Since I have gotten older and will be 26 the end of April, I don’t go to the gym as much. I don’t eat as well as I used to and I don’t wear the same style of clothing.  I want to be known for Maegen, who I am, not how I look. The transition has not been easy, and I still have my moments where I critique my body and wish I was the size I was three years ago. 

But it’s not my focus now- and life shouldn’t be about that. You have to learn to accept yourself, your fault, your regrets and you have to grow from there.  I may not be as thin as I used to be- but I am stronger emotionally that I used to be as well.

And that’s a powerful thing.

Head over to Whispering Sweet Nothings and check Shane's amazing blog!