I get it, I borrowed the book from a friend and I don't think I even finished it. I'm not the type to like fictional literature, and quite honestly the sex scenes made me squeamish. I'd rather read something of more value, but to each their own. These books seemed to finally be a way for women to pursue something sexual, and frankly men seemed to be a little uptight about it.
But it's just a book. There are no pictures of nudity. There are no video clips of a woman being degraded in modern internet pornography. Alas, it's a book. A sexual one, but still a book. With no pictures.
Recently the trailer for the movie was released, and all over social media women are posting how either hot they think the actor playing Christian Grey is, or how they are disappointed and a better actor should of been chosen.
I had the pleasure of reading a blog post by Haley Morgan Smith, The Problem with 50 Shades of Grey.
I loved her insight, and her opinions. She brought up strong points about how she would feel if her husband walked in the door, sexualized book in hand, talking of how hot the female actress is, and then later logging on to his Facebook account and posting non-stop about how excited he was to see this super sexy film with the fine actress. She wrote about how this would make her feel- that clearly she'd want to punch him in the throat. I agree with ya, girlfriend.
My point is- don't men do this everyday? Has our society become immune to the "average red-blooded American male" who is not only allowed, but can't help drooling over any attractive woman they see? That women sexualized on TV and the media are just a normal part of it and seeing semi-nude Maxim magazine covers, and even the fitness models now who pose almost naked in the gym. Please tell me, what is the difference?
Pornography is something we cannot escape these days. It's everywhere, and I guarantee 13-year-olds find access to the plethora of XXX websites available these days via the internet. How can these young boys possibly learn to respect women when they constantly see them as sexual objects? Much less, how can young girls respect themselves when they too want to be "wanted" by members of the opposite sex?
Haley's article is very well-written and I truly see her point, that it's wrong and hurtful to betray and objectify anyone else than your significant other. I get that- I just don't think it's fair at all to say that many men haven't been doing that for a long time. So much so, I think it's become natural for our society to accept that men have wondering eyes. After all, they wouldn't be "men" if that's what you call it, without acting that way.
With the internet has come the new way of objectifying women.
According to Caroline Heldman and Lisa Wade, authors of Sexualizing Sarah Palin, since the 1970's the popularity of pornography has led to a higher degree of objectifying women.
"Advances in communication technologies have enabled a new era of objectification, marked by an increasing presence and acceptance of sexual objectification in media, greater pornographic content in mainstream media, and greater acceptance of pornography in the U.S. more broadly" (Heldman, Wade, p. 3, 2011).
Personally, I don't think any person should make their significant other feel small, or unattractive. I would never drop hints or say anything to hurt the man in my life, but I think it's very unfair to say that 50 Shades of Grey has created a problem with women lusting after other men, when it's been happening to women for decades.
Really America, are we just that oblivious?
Heldman, C., & Wade, L. (2011). Sexualizing Sarah Palin. Sex Roles, 65(3/4), 156-164. doi:10.1007/s11199-011-9984-6.
